STILL UNDER PRESSURE!!!!

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JUNE!!!! Just a few more days until the first day of SUMMER!!!! Yes indeed, rays of sun and endless rainy days! I love summer! OH YEAH! It’s also the month of celebrating Father’s Day! Thus the same song and dance begins, “When are you having a baby”? “When are you going to make me a GRANDMA!!!!!!!!!”? My answer remains the same, “24 more months”. Why 24 months? Well, 1 year is too soon and 36 months sounds too long. None the less, I wanted to know why my friend, a single father of the cutest little girl with the prettiest eyes, agreed to have a child with his wife at the time. Here’s what he had to say:

Age: 30                                                                                                

Race/Ethnicity: Hispanic

Religion/religious belief: Christian

Marital status: Divorced

Years married: 3

Children: 1

How old were you when they were born? 24

Were you married before you had kids or after? I was married before

Did that change your marriage for better or worse? Better

Benefits of having children?  One word: FAMILY, a child elaborates on your perspective of having a “family”. One has to fully adjust their entire life with having this child.

Cons to having children?  I didn’t view it as a CON. It’s hard to be involved with certain couples that do not have children.

Are your parents still married? Yes

Were you planning on having a child? Yes, we were planning for children EVENTUALLY! But at the time, NO. Although, I always wanted two children.

Did the child add stress to you or the marriage? My daughter didn’t add stress, she added “need”.  When our daughter was born my wife was in the process of finishing school, therefore she was hardly home, so I was always home with our daughter.

How long were you together before you found out you were pregnant? 2 years dating and then married for 2 years.

Do you feel that your parent’s marriage influenced your own family? No.

Why did you have a child? I believe in the vision of family. Other factors led into play, like my ex-wife stopped taking contraceptives without my knowledge. She told me a week later ( after she had found out) that she was pregnant knowing we were not prepared for this life altering event.

Do you think you were prepared for the child? I don’t think ANYONE is EVER prepared for a child. People live to their economic means and for this reason, one becomes prepared.

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